There are many ways to live a life. There are many ways to not live a life as well. For the longest time, I felt like I was doing the latter. Oh, I was breathing in oxygen, and breathing out carbon dioxide at a regular frequency. But I felt like something was missing from the equation of breathing in and out. It wasn't like I was breathing in and out for some awesome goal in the future. I didn't want children or marriage, so what was I actually living for? Just to keep on buying a lot of useless shit, to put into a home that I barely spent anytime in. I spent all of my free time shopping, because I was so bored at work, that I needed to soothe myself with lots of pretty little things, that lost their shimmer almost as soon as I had purchased them. I wanted to spend my time doing something else. When I poked…
I’m sure this is the same for a lot of people on this planet. My quarter-life crisis didn’t come to me until I turned 30. When I was 25, I was still foolish, still searching, and still dreaming. I thought everything would work out perfectly, because I still had a lot of time. But when I turned 30, all of a sudden, there was this alarm bell that rang out in my head that said, “Warning, warning, you are 30, and you haven’t accomplished anything useful with your life.”
That was the whole point of my crisis. My existential crisis, or my quarter life crisis, whatever you wish to call it. I hadn’t accomplished anything that I could be proud of until then. Yes, I had filled my life with stuff. I had filled my life with nonsense. I had done things. So many things. Things to speak about, things to brag about, things to fill my conversations and head with.
But those things, were they meaningful to me in any big way? Not really. They didn’t touch my heart. They were fun to speak of, and other people would go buggy-eyed when they heard me tell my lifestory. But I knew in my own heart that I had not reached my highest potential. (more…)
A few months ago, I heard this story about entrepreneurship from Denise Duffields-Thomas who wrote the book, Get Rich, Lucky Bitch. It really exemplified for me the importance of going back to the basics, of taking back control by making things as simple as possible.
She said this, “A few years ago, I was at a conference for six figure income business owners who wanted to move to the next level. I had a six-figure business, but I wanted to get over to that next level. I wanted a seven-figure business. And in my head, I was imagining that I would have to do all of these crazy things in order to get there. Then, an individual who had a seven-figure business got up to speak to us about how he ran his business. As he started speaking about all of the different things he did, I realized, happily, that I did exactly the same things as him. I was already doing them! It was just a matter of keeping on going, and waiting for momentum to build up.”
This story is brilliant to me for so many reasons. But the main thing that it shows me, is that people always think that they need to do all of these fancy-schmancy things in order to move over to the next level. Or to do anything great. (more…)
When I was younger, in my twenties, I didn’t believe in myself enough. Whatever the reason might have been, I believed that I wasn’t strong enough to handle everything that life sent at me. I thought I was weak, and I needed other people. There wasn’t enough stuff inside of me to handle all of the shit that the universe hurled at me (of course, I hadn’t discovered that adage that the universe only sends at you, what you can handle).
All of this to say, because I wasn’t enough to myself, I always searched for meaning, and ideas, and support outside of myself. I wanted to be more, I wanted to be enough, but I believed that I wasn’t. Thus, I searched for stuff outside myself.
I say this because it is important to say this out loud. I see so many people every single day asking me for help and feedback and I am happy to give them the initial push to where they want to go. But, I always end every email or message with the same warning – the more we search for something outside of ourselves, the more we are going to be lost.(more…)
In Chiang Mai, I live in an apartment building with lots of senior citizens. There are lots of older people from all over the world who come to retire in Chiang Mai. They are living the good life of perpetual sunshine, good food, and ease in Chiang Mai. Guess what is the first thing all of them say to me?
‘You are so lucky you decided to travel when you are younger. We waited too long. I shouldn’t have waited until retirement to live this life. It was a mistake. I could have done this earlier and it would have been the same. Worried too much about money, I wasted way too much on accumulating wealth that wasn’t necessary.’
Following Dreams Matters
When I first heard those words, I didn’t think much of it. But I kept on hearing it not only from older people, but from everyone back home. They were in awe of my life. Jealous, they kept on telling me to keep on going. I took it as a sign from the universe. (more…)
I have been in observation mode since I landed in Chiang Mai (CM), watching the Farangs (the foreigners/expats), and the local Thai people. I started wondering what exactly indicates someone is wealthy, or someone is poor, in today’s world. If you walk around the markets in CM, you will notice knock-offs for any and every brand you can think of.
I bought knock-off Converse sneakers for $6 – it says Loy Star on the back, but they look as real as any Converse shoe would. With all of these knock-offs available at ridiculous prices, most people in CM are walking around wearing brand-name items. With food being so cheap, most local people buy all of their meals from outside as do the Farangs.
All of this brings up the question, what does true wealth mean in this new world system?
Are you wealthy if you have a lot of time?
I don’t think so. There are many people who sit, and loaf around, drinking all day, but don’t have enough money to do the things they dream about doing. There are local shop vendors with whom I have spoken who tell me how bored they are waiting for customers, begging customers to come in for a massage, and so on. That doesn’t seem like wealth to me.
Either these individuals don’t realize that their time is limited, or they just have too much of it, sitting around waiting for things to happen to them. (more…)