When I was a child, I thought that I had eons to do all of the things that I wanted to do with my life. I wanted to be a writer, and that was a dream that had stuck with me forever and ever. But, I was told that it was not the most lucrative and realistic dream to have. I decided it would be more lucrative to become a doctor. So I persevered at that. As hard as I could.
But that wasn’t hard enough or good enough. Because I didn’t get in. Three times I applied, and three times, I failed. It was fine. I still had other options. I could try something else. Maybe get a business degree, and become a marketing guru. Or get into a technology company and try to work in social media. Whatever it might be. Whatever it could be, it wasn’t going to be writing, of course.
Writing wasn’t worth it. It wasn’t going to make me any money. No way, no how.
As much as I tried to avoid the truth, my soul or spirit or whatever you want to call it (I like to call it my essence) kept on prodding at me, kept on poking at me. ‘Hey, you,’ it said, over and over again, ‘you are getting distracted from your true purpose. You are supposed to be doing something else.’
You Cannot Fool Your Spirit Or Soul No Matter How Hard You Try
I still didn’t learn my lesson, even though it was thrown at me in so many different ways by my essence. It tried so hard, I feel for it. It was persistent. Over and over again, I was told, you are not going on the right path.
As soon as I heard that, I didn’t wait for the rest of it. I didn’t wait to hear what my actual path was supposed to be. I just went on going on the same old rotten path. Or I detoured into even wronger rotten path.
Not listening, not listening, not listening all over my teens, and twenties.
I tried so hard to fool my essence. I tried to lull it into acceptance by feeding it oodles of alcohol, and drugs, and carbohydrates, and sugars, and sex.
Everything and anything. I tried it all. Except, of course, what it most wanted. But, no matter what I did, my soul did not take the hint. I tried to fool it in so many different ways, but it did not listen. It did not care. My soul wanted more. It had an idea in its head. All it wanted to do was to write. To write, and write, and write some more.
I was too afraid to give my soul what it wanted. So it ignored it, and pretended like I didn’t hear what it was saying. I moved here and there and everywhere.
Until You Come Back Onto The Right Path, Your Soul Won’t Listen
Thankfully, our soul or spirit is so persistent. It has a one-track mind. All it wants to do is write for me, and all it will do is write. Those days that I give it what it wants, its happy and satisfied.
But every day that I don’t write, it whimpers, and cries, and begs me to go back to writing again and again. I love it, because it’s a constant alarm clock in my head and body, ringing and reminding me that I am missing out on the passion of my life. Why would I not write when I know that it’s one of those things that gives me ultimate joy? Well, because I’m human, and I am filled with stupid fears that keep me from doing the things that I love best.
But my soul, my essence is great. It keeps reminding me that I am supposed to be writing. Write, you damn fool, write.
That’s all it says to me every moment of every single day. It tells me over and over again that I am supposed to be writing, and all of the other stuff I do in order to distract myself, or to waste my time, is just that, a time waster of the biggest sort.
Until you do the same, until you come back onto the path that is truest for you, your soul or spirit will do the same. It will keep on reminding you over and over again. You are supposed to be doing this and not that. So stop being an idiot. Stop being an idiot, and go back to your right path.
As Soon As You Listen To Your Soul’s Hankerings, Everything Sets Up Perfectly
While I ignored my soul’s hankerings, there was this deep hunger in my heart. It was always there, poking at me, over and over again, like a sort of Chinese water torture. But as soon as I listened to it, as soon as I gave it what it wanted, that deep hunger was gone.
Everything, as it is, fell into place, perfectly. As perfectly as you can imagine. No more hunger either for sugar or for sex or for junk food or for shopping mindlessly or for the wrong relationships… or for all of those other crappy distractions that sucked me dry.
No more of that nonsense. It was unnecessary. I wasn’t trying to distract myself. I was just living my life as it was meant to be lived. My soul had no need to poke at me, as long as I was doing what I was supposed to be doing. And I had no need to drug my soul because I was doing what I was meant to be doing.
I want that for you guys as well. You will have no need to run away from yourself anymore, as long as you listen to what you are supposed to be doing. Just do it, your body will thank you, your waistline will thank you, your heart will thank you, your finances will thank you.
It’s better than any drug out there, doing what your soul is meant to be doing here. It’s better than any sugary carbohydrate-laden food out there. Nothing takes its place.
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