I have been speaking to a lot of people in the past few weeks who have been ‘impressed’ by me. I get uncomfortable with this kind of flattery, so I always turn it into a question right back at them. ‘What exactly are you impressed by?’ This gives me a chance to turn a potentially awkward compliment time, into lesson time for me.
Usually when I do that, people have been saying the following things:
‘You have this primal, powerful energy that emanates from you wherever you go.’
‘You seem to know what your path is and where you are going.’
‘You are living a big powerful life. I wish I could do that.’
I Wish I Could Do That
Boom! As soon as someone says that they wish they could do something I am doing, that is a trigger for me. Instantly, I go into teaching mode. I want to give them all of what I have learned over the past few years by dumping it all in their lap. The unfortunate thing is that when I do that, most people end up using nothing. So I have started giving my life lessons in bite-sized pieces, something people can actually apply practically in their lives.
From all of the conversations, I believe the most important thing that has changed my life from the teeny-tiny life that it was to this powerful magnificent beast, is ‘The Power Of Thinking Big‘.
Seriously!! I’m not joking about this stuff (I never joke about this stuff).
I have changed my life primarily because I have been able to stop thinking small, and replace my small thinking with huge thinking.
How did I do that?
That’s exactly what I’m here to share with you. Just some things I did in the past, and some things I still do on a daily basis to change my life.
Tip 1: Words Are Powerful
I have said this before. I am extremely careful about the words I use to describe myself and my life on a daily basis. I will not let a negative word stay in psyche for longer than five seconds and I will use all of my energy to eliminate any negativity from my life.
I have let go of friends who are negative even though we were friends for years. I have stopped listening to the News or reading beauty magazines. I have unfollowed people on my Facebook feed who are negative. I have walked away from conversations that are negative or stopped people in their tracks when they wanted me to go on a pity party with them.
No way is that happening.
Not only is my body a temple, but my mind is as well. And I’m only going to grow beautiful flowers in there. No negative weeds will be allowed to flourish in there.
I also started using words like ‘Limitless’ and ‘Powerful’ and ‘Unstoppable’ for myself. I write morning pages and every morning I take a chance to tell my subconscious how limitless, powerful, and unstoppable I am. I use these words for myself all the time.
In the beginning, they seemed awkward and unsuited to me. But the more I used them, the more I began to embody them.
Our mind has this weird thing where it doesn’t like discrepancy so it will try to reduce discrepancy as much as possible. If you are telling yourself you are powerful but you aren’t really, your mind will try to make it so either you stop saying that, or you become powerful.
Our minds are so freaking powerful. Let’s use them to our advantage.
Tip 2: Surround Yourself With Big Thinkers
When I first decided I wanted to live a big life (it wasn’t that long ago, Jan 2016), I decided to surround myself body, mind, and soul with people who were big thinkers. I read books written by big thinkers, like Steve Jobs, and Tony Robbins. I listened to audiobooks and YouTube videos every morning by big thinkers. I joined masterminds filled with big thinkers. I immersed myself in big thinking.
I knew that my subconscious would get the hint eventually if I kept on telling it about all the big thinking out there. It was inevitable.
Use All Of Your Senses To Learn
I also really immersed myself in these teachings by using all of my senses. I would dance while listening to these audiobooks so I could engage my kinaesthetic senses and auditory senses simultaneously. I would cook while listening to these audiobooks so I was engaging my creative senses and my auditory senses simultaneously. I went for long walks through downtown Toronto while listening to these words, again engaging two or three senses at once. I read these words as well in addition to listening to them. I visualized these words and imagined myself becoming bigger and bigger – so big that I would overtake this whole freaking world.
I recommend you do the same. We usually end up using only one or two senses to learn, but if we use all of our senses, it will enhance our learning experience a hundred-fold. Not only will we remember stuff better, but we will be able to store it for longer.
Tip 3: Interview Big Thinkers To Learn How They Speak, And Think
Just like Napoleon Hill, when he wrote ‘Think And Grow Rich’ (a brilliant, brilliant book), I interviewed as many rich, powerful, online business owners as I possibly could. If I couldn’t talk to them face-to-face, I would Skype them or I would listen to their podcasts, or I would speak to their Executive Assistants.
I just want to learn how these people thought. I wanted to learn what words they used when they spoke. I wanted to immerse myself in their brains.
The more I did this, the more I realized three things:
- There are very minor differences between big thinkers and I. They are not smarter than me, or more hard-working, or, whatever. This was a big shock to me. I thought these people had some sort of secret that I wasn’t privy to. That is absolutely not true.
- But, they believe in themselves and their path indubitably. They will not anyone sway them from what they set out to do.
- They also use beautiful powerful words to describe themselves on a daily basis in their heads, and outwardly. They never denigrate themselves. They wouldn’t touch negative words with a ten-foot pole.
I Am So Freaking Powerful
The basics are what change people’s lives. I started following these basic steps for myself. I used powerful words. I spent time surrounded by big thinkers. And, I spent my time telling myself how freaking powerful I am using the following phrases:
I am getting bigger and bigger every single day. I am getting so big that not only will this tiny body not be able to hold my bigness, but this entire world will be in awe of my bigness. My bigness will take over this entire freaking universe. I am so big that even the universe will be in awe of me. I’m that powerful.
How does reading those words make you feel? Now read those words while yelling and stamping your foot and just being big in general. It will change your entire outlook towards yourself, right?
I did this daily.
Did it make me feel awkward as fuck? Yes! Did it make me feel foolish? Yes, of course! I felt like an idiot at first.
Thank God, I lived on my own, in an apartment that was well-insulated. I never heard anyone complain about my power talk. Also, I did it after 9am at home when everyone was probably at work.
I also walked around downtown Toronto saying these words to myself over and over again (under my breath muttering like a crazy person. Thank God, there’s lots of people in downtown Toronto doing exactly the same).
Power Is Automatic Now
After a while of practicing these words, postures, and ideas, I realized that I started exuding this sense of power automatically. I didn’t have to think about it anymore. I walked around the world looking everyone straight in the face without any fear or any doubt. I knew who I was and I wasn’t afraid to let you know that. I used power words for myself on a daily basis without effort.
Nowadays, people tell me they feel my power and it is intimidating.
For some reason, women aren’t supposed to have this kind of power inside of them. I’ve been told to stop being so big, stop laughing so big, stop walking so big, stop smiling so big.
It’s all bullshit.
I’m going to be as big as I possibly can and if you feel intimidated by that, you can go cry in a corner about it. I used to feel bad about it, but now I just look at it as an interesting lesson in how people will try to put you down in anyway they can.
When I’m told to be small, I end up going bigger. I laugh out so loud that the entire restaurant turns around to look at me. I walk with such a powerful stride (shoulders back, stomach taut, chakras engaged for battle) that people will get out of my way on the streets. I speak with such power in my voice that even if I am saying something entirely wrong, it sounds right (ha, just kidding about this one).
Fake It Until You Make It – Living Big
My practice with everything new to me is to fake it until I make it. I do this with every new skill that has come into my life. I have done it especially with thinking big and being powerful (BTW, when you are powerful, you automatically think big. Powerful people cannot think small. Power brings with it bigness).
In the beginning, I faked being powerful until I embodied it completely. I would fake my power posture, even if I felt small, I would stand, walk, and tall BIG. I opened up my vocal chords, and started speaking up in public. I started doing a lot of live videos so I could practice speaking and being small (now it comes naturally to me). I started talking back to people who I would normally have let trample all over me.
Even now, somedays, I don’t feel powerful.
I feel crappy and down in the dumps and PMS-y. Those days, I will pull my shoulders back, and speak with power to myself and to others. I pretend, and the more I pretend, within minutes, I start feeling powerful.
I have said before – Physiology is psychology and vice versa. If you are feeling small, start thinking big and you will change your mind. Or start walking big, and you will start feeling big. Or start talking big, and you will feel big automatically.
It’s all interconnected.
One Big Power Tip – Look People In The Eye
This one is hard for a lot of people. We are told not to look at people in the eye. Not only is it rude in certain cultures, but women are supposed to be submissive and look to the ground.
Let’s beat all of these bullshit ideas into the ground.
Look everyone you meet in the eye. Directly in the eye.
Powerful people do not look away and they are not intimidated when someone looks them directly in the eye. In fact, powerful people appreciate and respect individuals who look them in the eye.
People have told me that I have this intense gaze that melts them. They are unable to look at me directly for long, because my eye gaze completely unravels them. They have never been looked at like this.
Powerful people don’t give a fuck about other people. Also, we have no shame. We are living our lives fully and we do not apologize for it. So we look people in the eye. We know we are amazing as we are, and we do not need to be sorry about anything.
I look people in the eye. My power shows through that way. I have intimidated many people by looking directly at them. They just can’t take it.
That’s when I know that they are not at the same level as me. It shows me who they truly are.
If you can look at me directly in the eye, I respect you more and I feel the power emanating from you.