INFJs don’t know how to take care of themselves. We really don’t. I mean, we are good at taking care of others. We know exactly what all of the people, whom we love in our life, need. Exactly and always. We will be able to tell you how much food you need, how much alone time, how much water, and we will worry incessantly about your physical and emotional needs.
But we have no idea how to put all of that caring back upon ourselves. In fact, we are probably so busy taking care of others, and spending time on our obsessions, and interests, that we forget to do the basics for ourselves.
An Unhealthy INFJ With A Terrible Mind Body Connection
For an extremely unhealthy INFJ, it will be easy for them to forget all of the basics for days on end. In fact, I have had moments when I was younger when I forgot to eat, and sleep for days. I would skip two or three meals and then wonder why I had this pounding headache. I wouldn’t be able to sleep all night. And then wake up wondering how was I ever going to get through the day on no sleep. I would forget to brush my teeth (gross, I know!), and I would forget to change my clothes. Worst of all, I would forget to drink water for hours on end, as I sat there on my computer with my latest obsession, and realize that I was in the early stages of dehydration.
It’s not a nice place to be, especially since as an INFJ, we are also extremely wary of other people taking care of us. Thus, I would get into a mode where I had not taken care of myself physically for days, and a loved one would try to feed me or take care of me, and I would lash out upon them like a surprised viper.
If You Are Friends Or Lovers With An INFJ, Please Try To Take Care Of Them
Yes, your INFJ will argue with you that they are superhumans, and they don’t need food or sleep or water. Yes, they are foolish creatures, especially when they are mired in the depths of their obsessions.
Do not trust them for a single second. Their brain functions regarding their physical needs are sorely diminished when they are obsessed with something new, or in their default mode of learning, growing, and studying.
If I had my way, I would pair every single INFJ on the planet with a loved one, who would be able to go up to them once a day and check if they have had enough food, sleep, and water. If only I could wave a magic wand, and make that happen… Sigh.
But that’s not possible. The only thing I can do is ask you to do that for your particular INFJ. They take care of you so well that you assume that they know how to do the same for themselves. But they don’t. They really have no clue how to do the same for themselves. And thus, it would be nice if you became that default caretaker for your INFJ.
INFJs Can Be So Foolishly Stubborn Sometimes
And believe me, they will argue with you until the moons and stars come out. They will argue with you until the cows come home. They will argue with you into oblivion. Really, they will.
They are not the smartest when it comes to knowing what their own bodies needs in order to stay healthy and alive. Thus, even if they argue that they know what’s best for them, believe me when I say, they don’t.
Feed them at least two meals a day, if not more. Leave a bottle of water besides their workstation so they can notice it occasionally and gulp down a bunch of water. And please for God’s sake, when they argue that they can go without sleep for another night, force them into bed, and force them to sleep.
Why Are INFJs So Terrible At Taking Care Of Their Physical Needs?
One of the main reasons I knew I was terrible at taking care of myself is because I used to get so distracted by my work and obsessions that I would forget that a real physical world exists out there. We have a tendency to live in our dream worlds. And, we love it there. We never want to leave.
But our physical bodies need us to come back to this realm, and take care of it. We just hate it. I think all INFJs, if they could transfer their consciousness into a robot, while they physical body rots away, would be happy to do it. Who needs a physical body? The only thing they want is the ability to dream, imagine, and learn.
We also have a terrible mind body connection, which means that even though our stomachs might be giving us a signal that it’s hungry, because we spend so much time in our heads, we forget to pay attention to that message. Or worse, we might be so ingrained in our work that we might not get that message from our stomach at all. It might get mixed up in all of the other signals going to our brain, and we get distracted very easily.
Two Things To Move Towards A Better Mind-Body Connection
Thus, in order to move away from this madness, I recommend two very important things.
- Set up a schedule for yourself for your meals, and sleep. I know that unless I have scheduled food into my day, I will be too busy to even think about it. And unless I force myself to go to bed at 10pm every day, I would spend all night working on my projects.
- Do some kind of physical exercise, like yoga, Qigong, or Tai Chi. This will help you heal that mind body connection that is so broken within you. Yoga has been absolutely miraculous in helping me build back that connection to my body. That I had completely severed in my teens.
These two things have helped me immensely in moving away from always feeling ill due to skipping meals, water, or sleep. I am stronger now. And have more energy to do my creative work. Because I do not forget that I am not just an imagination-filled mind. But an actual real physical body that has needs in this physical realm. I don’t think I would be able to do all of the YouTube videos that I do (I have been doing one a day now for almost 3 years), if I wasn’t actually taking care of my physical body with the way I have.