One of the main reasons my INTJ sister and I fight is because she doesn’t understand that I see the world in extreme shades of gray. Whereas for her the world is more a case of black and white, with a little bit of gray somewhere in there, sometimes. Decisions are easier for her, and not so much for me.
In fact, this is one of the main reasons why I despised myself for the longest time. I used to think that I am weak or I don’t really have a mind of my own, because I would flit from opinion to opinion, depending on the day, and my mood. Even now, I have a tendency to occasionally negate my awesome ability to see both sides of the situation, and mediate on the subject matter.
Why are INFJs like this? Our ability to see all sides of the situation comes from our deep empathic capacity. We have a big heart, but we are also able to use said big heart, to peer into people’s minds and hearts, and see life from their perspective. Whenever I am in the middle of an argument between two people I love, I have an extremely difficult time siding with one person or the other, because truly I can see the world from both of their sides, and both of their sides are right in their own way. How could I possibly choose one more than the other? It seems an impossible task.(more…)